Florida Man Today

Man Arrested After Hiring Undercover Detective to Murder His Brother

Some people talk it out and some hire contract killers to take care of the problem. The latter is what 54-year-old Gary Hudge opted for.

Hudge met with an undercover detective recently to dish out some cash to see his brother killed because of financial disagreements. He offered locations and addresses for his brother, as well as transportation and guns to commit the murder as well.

After making a monetary exchange, he was taken into custody. He currently resides in Pinellas County Jail and is charged with solicitation of murder, sale of a controlled substance and possession of a controlled substance, all crimes of which he has already admitted to committing.

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Sunday Funnies, Vol. 26

  1. Woman Kicks Officer in Groin During Arrest – A 43-year-old Sharee Sandoval had the police called on her during a verbal dispute with her boyfriend recently. The two had been drinking and arguing at the Roadway Inn Motel. It resulted in Sandoal ‘mule kicking’ the arresting officer in the groin. As she continued to kick at the officer, he was forced to punch her in the back of the head. She’s currently in Gallatin County Jail (Montana) on $5K bond (READ).
  2. Man’s Photos Go Viral After Being Locked in 24-Hour Fitness – Dan Hill, a Utah native, was left inside his gym after employees had left, locking him behind the front door. So, he made the most of it, posting pictures of himself swimming and navigating the gym, calling it really a ’20-Hour Fitness’. Just before 1 am, after phoning police, the doors were unlocked and he posted a picture noting his freedom (READ).
  3. Woman in Disguise Tries on Watch and Runs Out of the Mall – Video captured a woman in disguise, decked out in sunglasses and a fur coat, at an S.M. Diamond Center at the North DeKalb Mall in Atlanta recently, as she is seemingly pondering the purchase, and then runs out of the store. The Rolex is valued at just under $5,000 and she made her getaway in a Mitsubishi Eclipse Cross, which was waiting for her outside. The owner runs around the corner in an attempt to catch her in a heated foot race, however, the woman was able to escape successfully (WATCH).
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Man Avoids Arrest by Hiding in Pond, Caught When He Came Up for Air

A 36-year-old Daniel Christopher Booth, in an attempt to evade capture by police, decided to take a chance, strip naked and hide submerged in a pond.

Spoiler alert: It didn’t work.

Booth, who worked at a nearby solar power plant in Wellborn, Fla., was sought by the Suwanee County Sheriffs Office, with warrants for his arrest in hand, for neighboring Baker County, for methamphetamine charges.

When officers arrived on the scene, Booth took off, despite the K9 units being deployed as well. Having garnered a head start, he de-clothed and hid underwater to evade pursuit. However, dogs are a lot smarter than him and hung around till he came up for air. At that point, was taken into custody, shirtless.

The Rambo impersonator was taken into custody at Suwanee County Jail and faces additional charges now as well, including resisting arrest.

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Man Skates into Walmart, Steals Over $500 in Items, Skates Out

A still-unidentified man ‘hovered’ into the Winter Haven Walmart recently, filled his cart up with over $500 in merchandise and then hovered straight out of the store. Video surveillance captured the whole thing!

That’s right, this thief from the future was rocking a pair of Voyager ‘Space Shoes’, which are e-mobility hover skate sneakers, retailing at around $200.

Video shows the man using the hover board to push the cart while he navigates the store and filling his cart. It’s presumed that the suspect left the scene in a 1990s Nissan Maxima, with two different chrome wheels and some distinguishable hood damage.

Some of the items he made off with include a car battery, bouquet of flowers, Roku TV and a Motokicks hoverboard, because apparently, this dude likes to float around.

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Woman Enters Walmart to Use Unpaid Items to Attempt to Make a Bomb

A 37-year-old Emily Stallard can now be branded as a domestic terrorist, after entering a Walmart, grabbing items of the shelves and attempting to make a bomb, in-store, while also with her young child in tow.

That’s right, Stallard assembled all items, made a makeshift bomb and attempted to detonate it in the supercenter. She was thwarted, however, thanks in part, to a security guard who noticed her roaming numerous aisles while accumulating multiple flammable materials and projectiles.

The security guard also notified an off-duty Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation officer who was also in the store at the time of the incident. The two were able to stop her just as she was attempting to light the wick of the hand-made bomb.

Sheriffs on the scene noted she had all the necessary items to ’cause a mass destruction’, so she definitely knew what she was doing.

Big ups to the two officers in-store for stopping what could have been a devastating incident!

Stallard is currently being held on $8,500 bond and has a laundry list of charges against her, including: attempted arson of a structure, child abuse and, as she was being taken away, battery on a law enforcement officer, because she decided to spit on the arresting deputy.

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Man Accused of Beating Elderly Golfer to Steal His Golf Balls

Tyler Dearden, 22-years-old, must have really needed golf balls, because he recently wandered onto a golf course and beat an elderly man to get his bucket.

Dearden came to the course with the purpose of stealing balls and, as he was collecting them, was told by a golfer to ‘not do that’. He then walked up to the elderly man, stating he wanted to apologize, and then punched him in the face, knocking him to the ground.

The senior citizen suffered bruises, cuts and a broken rib. Stitches were also required.

Dearden was jailed on $10,000 bond and charged with aggravated battery on a person 65 years or older.

Dearden told police he was defending himself because the man pointed his club in his face.

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Sunday Funnies, Vol. 25

  1. Man Calls Cops on Girl During Rough Sex – A 24-year-old Kristan Parris got a little too into it during a recent love-making session with her boyfriend, Taylor Hayes. She started to bite and scratch him, which prompted Hayes to phone police during sex. She also apparently punched him several times, leaving bite marks, scratches and bruises, which were all shown to police. She had taken off prior to police arriving, so a warrant was issued. She was later booked on domestic violence and assault charges, while serving some time in Metro Nashville Jail (READ).
  2. Men’s Beards May Contain More Germs Than Dog’s Fur – That’s right, a bearded man may indeed carry more yucky than a sweet doggy dogg, per a recent study. The test took samples of 18 men and 30 dogs, resulting in higher microbial counts in the beards than in the dogs and seven of those men contained health-threatening germs as well (READ).
  3. Parrot’s ‘Let Me Out’ Cries Prompts Police Visit – A neighbor heard ‘chilling cries’ of someone crying ‘let me out’ recently and called police. Turns out, it was her neighbor’s pet parrot. The Parrot’s name is Rambo and it doesn’t like being in a cage. Video shows the neighbor working on his car, the parrot crying out and police arriving (WATCH).
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Woman Hits Man with BMW, Attempts to Pee on Deputy

A 20-year-old Serina Maris Probus was stoked to get her mugshot, however, her charges are serious and she’ll surely lose that big smile real soon.

Probus is facing numerous felony charges in two-different incidents … IN THE SAME NIGHT!!!

She first hit a man with her BMW while strung out on cocaine and then tried to take a hot, steamy piss on the arresting officer.

She’s a class act.

Probus, drunk and high, first left her sister-in-law’s holiday party, her 6-month-old baby in tow, despite attempts by the family and friends to keep her at the home. She also bit said sister on the hand.

When being placed in the patrol car, shortly after hitting the man with her BMW SUV, she had to be restrained and placed in hobbles. This is when she attempted to pee on the officer and also spit on him.

So, to reiterate, she’s a class act.

She’s chilling in Pasco County Jail with charges of domestic violence, felony battery, felony aggravated battery with a deadly weapon and a few more misdemeanor charges as well, for good measure.

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Florida Feels: Man Sheds More Than 150 Pounds to Join the Military

Please allow 28-year-old Christian Montijo to serve as your 2020 motivation to get your lives together. The father of two dropped more than 150 lbs and then opted to serve his country in joining the U.S. Army!!!

For Montijo, it has been his dream to serve his country, but the weight was keeping him from doing it. So he did something about it. It was just about a year ago that he weighed more than 300 lbs., so with a plan in sight, he started a weight-loss campaign, which included meal prep and walks around his neighborhood.

He credits his kids as his primary motive in dropping the weight, but joining the military has always been a dream. When he felt he was good enough, he visited the Kissimmee recruiting station, but still needed to drop about 30 lbs.

By October of 2019, he had shed nearly 165 lbs and was finally able to enlist.

Montijo is now active and at basic training in South Carolina, while serving as a Satellite Communications Systems Ops Maintainer.

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Woman Arrested for Threatening McDonald’s Employees Over Dipping Sauces

A 19-year-old Maguire Marie McLaughlin wanted sauce for her nuggets, so she told a McDonald’s employee if she didn’t get any, there’d be trouble.

It turns out, she didn’t get the sauce she wanted for her chicken nuggets, but the employee claimed she wanted extra sauce, which costs $0.25-per-container. An argument ensued.

McLaughlin then stated she will ‘get the sauce by whatever means possible’ and that she would ‘come back and rob the restaurant’.

This pampered princess is clearly used to getting anything she wants, but not this time! Police arrived on the scene and took her into custody on disorderly conduct. She also had to be placed in restraints because she kept locking her legs as officers tried to take her away.

McLaughlin was arrested on threatening to rob charges and currently resides in Indian River County Jail.

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